It may have have been over two years since my last Sonar experience, but trust and believe, the 2019 edition still lives rent-free in my mind. In fact every time I am faced with confrontation, I retreat back to the chaotic concrete cube that is Fira Espanya and remember discovering incredible new acts every turn I took.

One of these artists was Lotic whose performance was the best kind – iiiiiinches of hair, wind machines, intimate lighting and that’s before we even get to the music. But Loverboy is here today to discuss the new era of Lotic, an era that is a whole new chapter in her story.

Having medically begun her transition in 2019, she is now an even stronger, self-assured artist than when I witnessed her killing it onstage. With her new album, Water, she is serving us intense, layered, even bigger-sounding production with her ethereal vocals telling us not only about her own journey but also how 1.8 million Africans died on the Middle Passage to America as part of the slave trade. In fact Lotic takes this very real event and pushes the story one step further to imagine a parallel universe where, “had their cells been able to adapt to this new ecosystem, and thrive and multiply, perhaps a glorious new culture and history would have been possible.”

Loverboy catches up with Lotic to discuss Water, how she loves developing a new skill and how she can knock out a song in a day. #Casual

So this is kind of major for me Lotic because the first time I saw you perform was at Sonar 2019 during the soundcheck and I was in awe. I was like, ‘Whaaaat? And this is just the soundcheck?!’ You were incredible. What are your memories of Sonar 2019?
Thank you! Sonar was a bit stressful, actually. Our bags got lost and we didn’t get them back til a few hours before showtime, so I was kinda over it by the time showtime came around, not gonna lie. But in the end it was actually an amazing time, despite the EXTREME heat.

Have you been back onstage yet since the Pandemic began?
I have! It’s very awkward, but kind of nice to have to adjust and find new ways to connect and engage with audiences. I like the challenge and love developing a new skill, hunnie! But I have zero endurance!! None.

Haha…you and me both. I am in love with your new single ‘Come Unto Me’. I am obsessed with the production in particular. Tell me about how the song came to be…
Thank you. The production was definitely intended to be very different from all my previous work as well as specific to the album from the beginning. I wrote and recorded the song all in one day – this is true for most of my work, actually. I left it slightly off-key in this case because of the yearning elements in the lyrics. Other songs are “perfect,” and I re-recorded certain passages and even certain words over and over and over again. But this one needed to be raw and direct and conversational and confrontational.

I know you have mentioned the Middle Passage. How has this connected with your own story in the present?
I think last year knocked all of us off our feet in one way or another. For me, I just felt completely disconnected from not only other people but from myself as well. I didn’t realize HOW MUCH I relied on being a performer for my well-being. I didn’t know who I was, and as I started searching for answers it kind of felt like the only option was to look backwards since the future was so uncertain. It was then that I found strength in recognizing the connections between myself and my family, and between my family and our heritage, and between our heritage and our history. Essentially, it was a bit of perspective that saved me.

Jordan Peele’s films, the excellent His House and Lovecraft Country have recently combined the horrors of racism with the genre of horror itself, allowing for deeper ideas to be explored. Taking the idea of the Middle Passage and offering a ‘What if….?’ narrative also takes this very real moment as its basis and explores other possibilities. I wondered what you thought of their work and if you saw it as in the same kind of universe?
Definitely! The ideas behind a lot of these works are peppered throughout Water as well as my own curiosities and longings. Black people have been through HELL and continue to suffer the worst, most unnecessary bullshit. Yet we never really revolted. Somehow our anger and history are constantly being dismissed and suppressed, and at the same time everybody wants to be us or consume us. Black people are obviously hyper aware of these opposing realities and of course are slowly becoming more and more vocal and militant, but we need alternate realities. This is why ‘Wakanda forever’ stuck. This is why we’re so protective of our heroes and our cornrows and our full lips and hips.

You’ve said that you dedicated two years to the “intentional process of surrendering to softness, welcoming impermanence, embracing intimate relationships.” What did this process entail and what was the result?
I’m still incredibly sensitive about it. The past THREE years actually were incredibly difficult, for a variety of reasons that for now I’ll keep private. I’m still retraining my brain to see the light and all the beauty that surrounds me. I’m still learning to shift my perspective to one that’s less self-centered. I’m still learning to ask for help. I’m still learning how not to shrink myself or lash out when I feel dysphoric or unheard/unseen or overwhelmed.
Long story short, my transition has been wild! I started medically early 2019 but mentally long before that. As so much of my being has changed, I’ve had to learn to trust again, how to relate to people again, how to process people’s perspectives and perceptions and projections. How to perform again…and all this while trying to survive full-time off an independent music career.
I definitely feel 5-10 times stronger and more sure of myself than I did before 2019, and I have always been an incredibly strong-minded girl, but it’s an ongoing process for sure.

The video for ‘Come Unto Me’ is so stunning. I know you’ve worked with the director Matt Lambert previously. What is the process like between you?
Thank you. We’ve worked together on so many things now for so long that it’s actually a pretty natural process for us both at this point, especially as we both grow individually as people and as artists. I think I sent one text, we had one meeting and we were shooting a few weeks later? It all came together very quickly.

What is your favourite song on the album at the moment?
It changes all the time, because this is actually the first thing I’ve made where every single moment is absolutely gorg to me. No skips! Taking a bit more time and care will do that I guess, haha. But right now I think it’s ‘Always you’!

This feels like such a conceptual record, have you given thought to how you will present it onstage?
I certainly have :}

Lastly Loverboy is named after the biggest selling single of 2001, so I always ask what is your favourite Mariah Carey song?
‘Fly like a bird’ because LISTEN TO HER VOICE. I would never shut up if I had that power and control. I mean I already don’t shut up but…..she’s amazing.